This is my formal statement on the matter. Iced coffee is valid in every season and I will not be silenced.
I Do Not Want Cinnamon Foam
Let me be clear. I do not hate warm drinks. I love tea. I love the idea of a cozy mug. But when it comes to coffee, I want it iced. I want it cold and slightly aggressive. I want it to taste like chaos with a splash of milk. I do not want it to smell like a candle and burn the roof of my mouth.
I Am Already Warm Enough Thank You
Between perimenopause and general overstimulation, I am not looking to add more heat to my life. If you see me with a hot drink, just know it was brewed under duress. My iced coffee cools me down emotionally and physically. It is not a trend. It is a coping strategy.
Autumn Does Not Mean Abandoning Myself
The pressure to conform in fall is wild. Suddenly we are all supposed to be wearing boots, sipping cider, and smiling through hayrides. No. I will not abandon the one thing that gets me through the day because Starbucks put out a new foam topping. I do not need a seasonal identity crisis. I need caffeine.
Cold Brew Is a Lifestyle
Iced coffee is not just a drink. It is a way of existing. It is mood control in liquid form. It is the first thing I reach for when I wake up and the thing I cradle like a security blanket while refusing to do anything productive. Hot coffee does not offer that kind of stability.
The Judgement Is Getting Out of Hand
Yes, I saw your side eye. Yes, I heard you ask really You are still drinking that It is fifty two degrees outside. First of all, that is not cold. That is brisk. That is refreshing. I am wearing a moomoo and house slippers. I am fine. Second of all, drink your seasonal foam and mind your business.
Let Me Sip in Peace
I do not care how many pumpkins you stacked in your front yard. I do not care how many maple spice TikToks you reposted. My coffee has ice in it. I am drinking it through a straw. I am romanticizing my own life in my own way and I will not be bullied.
So if you see me walking into October with an iced drink in my hand and an expression that says do not test me, just know I am thriving. I am caffeinated. I am emotionally regulated. And I am not here for your lukewarm opinions about what belongs in a seasonal mug.
Leave me and my cold beverage alone.